TRADING SKILLS/Psychology + Finding Oneself vs Being understood

Unrealistic expectations cause us to define/interpret and therefore perceive market information as threatening.
- Being Wrong
- Losing
- Missing Out
- Leaving Money on the Table

Fear will cause us to focus on the object of our fear so that we end up creating the experience we are trying to avoid.

*********************************************************************************

The one last bastion that I need to overcome to be a consistent trader is something that I feel has plagued me my whole life.  Growing up I knew and felt that I was different, now I don't mean that in the sense that I am superior or better than the others (even though I felt that way at the time) but over time--just different.  How I see the world vs how majority of others see the world is where my internal conflicts arise from which resulted in me achieving drastically "less than what my potential" could be.

Children have a relatively strong imagination vs adults.  They are more in touch with nature and with God and is commonly depicted as such.  The reason for this is that as children grow up, they are conditioned to such a way to be more "rational", less imaginative, and into thinking how to live inside "human constructs" that society creates.  If you don't adapt to society's or parents standards/expectations-- you are diagnosed with a mental disorder which ends up a self-fulfilling prophecy in most of the cases.

Our current science/psychology and developmental theories are very refined from how we though a 100yrs ago, but it's not exact/can still be further refined and this is where it falls apart and exactly how disorders are created.  We've created the illusion of disorder where there was no disorder in the first place.  In my case, majority of mental health personnel i've talked to would revert to their "studies/knowledge/degree" and become biased in their assessments which in turn would cause them to not see me for what I am.  I'm not saying this is "wrong" because there's really no right or wrong in life--it's how one perceives it and usually it's just the opposite side of the same coin/concept.

Getting back on topic, the rationalists would most of the time have a high probability of them telling me that growing up--I was still trying to find my place and figure out who I was in life.  This falls in line with how majority of people are but I didn't fall in that category.  Most people are just lost in life who pretends to know what it is that they are doing.  They give up pursuing their childhood goals and dreams and start to reason and justify that they are now an "adult" and have to live a certain way that opposes their hearts desires.  This is where their mind asserts control over their consciousness and some live their whole lives lost with the rationale that this is how society wants them to live their life so they are indeed living a good life.  And this is where disorders starts, internal conflicts between the heart and mind that causes people to turn to things/objects/actions/addictions that "numbs" the brain temporarily--just enough so that they can function yet again to society's wants and needs.  What's worse is those not financially knowledgeable/disciplined will fall into a similar cycle which is very, very hard to get out of unless they can first psychologically get out of it first--The Rat Race.  Personal Finance was never about numbers or money--it's about human behavior.

For me it was never about "growing up" into how society thinks, but me losing who I was into something that was "socially acceptable".  The "smarter and rationally knowledgeable" I get--the more dumber I got in my irrationality, imagination and intuition skills--and I saw/felt that.  Society does not fully accept/understand "crazy" people unfortunately but it is the imaginative people of today which without doubt shapes society's tomorrow.

I had always known who I was through a priori.  It was never about me finding out who I am, but what it was--was me trying to have society/others try to understand me which I HAVE to understand that this will never happen.  I have visions that society just cannot see.  I need to come to terms that Society will never be able to accept me--I just need to accept them.

*Side note: I've always noticed people in life trying to figure/think me out.  I've sometimes said don't think about how I think--then you'll understand me.  They'll give me a weird face that I'll laugh at internally.  It's sad but I've always known that they don't understand me, I just never accepted it.

Simpler terms, I am someone who can see and think outside of human constructs/societies limitations/box (if there ever was one).  But i'm always conflicted on why so very few can see that.  On a similar note, in the past i've always argued and tried to explain to my older sister Charlotte that we as a family is different than the rest of other people in terms of intelligence/knowledge but she perceives that she is just normal and average compared to other people.  It's funny that I try to show her that but at the same time not fully embodying/accept the concept i'm trying to show her.  This is where I need to fully embrace that--because in short, it shows up in my trading.

I've been doing alot of  Acceptance and Commitment therapy and applying mindfulness techniques to combat this internal conflict.  Increasing my communication skills/language/active listening skills has also shortened the gap between being able to explain how/what I am in ways the others can understand.  In short, I am a metaphysician, mathematician who happens to love dabbling in Theroretical and Quantum Physics as well as logic.  If i'm ever able to overcome this last psychological barrier that i've noticed i keep running into--this will set of a chain of events that are already deterministic that I will become a disciplined, consistent and profitable trader.. i.e. ATM machine ka-ching ka-ching !!

Weekly Review

From Last Week:
- Fun Thanksgiving with fam
- Halted studying during holiday week

- Finished New Rules of Pennystock (8hrs)
- No Webinars yet
- No EPR Bullets yet
- Got alot of good Trading Psychology down though (8hrs)

Schedule for the Upcoming Weeks
Sunday
- Finish B1/B2's LOC/MFR
- 5 EPR Bullets
- 2-3 Webinars

Monday
- 5 EPR Bullets
- 2-3 Webinars
- VA Appt

Tuesday
- FINISH EPR
- 2-3 Webinars

Wednesday
- FINISH Whatever else
- 2-3 Webinars

Thursday
- MUST COMPLETE Trading system/process
- 3-4 Webinars/Reintegrate with the Markets

Friday
- Reintegrate with the Markets/Platforms
- WEBINARS !!

Saturday
- WEBINARS !!!

GOAL:
- WEBINARS !!!
- Increase reading on ACCEPTANCE
- Increase reading on Conscious Listening/Mindfulness/Increasing Attention and Focus

DECEMBER 3-9
- WEBINARS

DECEMBER 10-16
- WEBINARS / Tracking Market

DECEMBER 17-23
- WEBINARS / Start Trading


Habits Update

Rituals (For Work Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day

On the road to work

- 30mins of Audiobook

Once I have downtime at work

- Challenge Content

On the road from work

- 30mins of Audiobook

As soon as I get home (In progress)
- Study 0700 - 1030, 5min Journal/Meditation
- Bed routine by 1120 Asleep by 1200

Rituals (For Off Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day
- Stretch Phys. Therapy Regimen

Anything goes on my off day

"Once I have a system, the only thing that matters is the six inches between my ears..."






--------------------------- For December -------------------------------
**** Gamblers think about profits, Traders think about Risk ****
Shifting my attitude/mindset from making money and towards:

1) Risk Management
- Know risk prior to trade
- Know stop loss prior to trade
- Size position accordingly to the stop loss

2) Managing Emotions
- No more zombie trading
- No more revenge trading

3) Managing Mind
- Regular Meditations
- Objectivity Exercises

Mandatory Weekly Goals....
A) Zero (0) Zombie trades
B) Zero (0) Revenge trades
C) Trade only quality/Go-To-Setups.. (Think retired trader)

** Something I want to do in the future--Watch a stock's price action with NO indicators

Rule: If I have either 1 zombie trade or 1 revenge trade during February, I will sit out from trading for a mandatory 1 week cooling off. This will be a negative incentive that will turn me off from making those type of trades since almost all my motivation and raison d'être currently is daytrading.

*** ACCEPTANCE ***

Nicene Creed, Fighting Dogma,

The original version is as follows:

We believe in one God, the Father Almighty, Maker of all things visible and invisible.

At mass today we use the Nicene-Constantinopolitan profession of faith.

I believe in one God, Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, and of all things visible and invisible.

Do you see a difference? One can say, oh it's a tiny difference but that tiny difference has huge implications that can result in possibly mind-controlling a huge population or accumulating massive amounts of wealth--all through a simple addition or redaction of words.

Ever heard of the telephone game or chinese whispers?  Errors typically accumulate in the translations and re-tellings so what is being taught as dogma today differs significantly from that of the God's original message.

For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.. We are all part of God, I am a part of God.  Christ was part of God, but somewhere along the line we started to teach that Christ was God.  By that same logic, I am God--but I know i'm not.  Christ was a human and a prophet--he is not God but a part of God.  Muhammed is not God but a part of him.  Buddha is not God but a part of him.

Islam is a peaceful religion? Christianity is a peaceful religion?  It can be but it's hijacked by people that contradicts the original teachings.  Pope Urban II? Thou shall not kill.. unless it's a non-christian.. Let's go kill in God's will!!

It saddening to see so many people mindwashed of the human constructs that the Roman Catholic Church.  No one church or religion is better than the other--they're just different.  But the lost followers of a specific faith will always profess their religion's superiority over another.  The average person's mind only allows them to think in good or bad, right or wrong but God is both.  Only when consciousness transcends over the mind do they see/hear God.

There is still truth in the Bible, Koran, Torah--however, there is so much blasphemy and human constructs in the Bible that was inserted by humans (Some with good intentions and others that don't) that it is very hard for the populace to be able to read beneath the words and beyond the voices.

**
At a young age, we are capable of listening to the words the universe speaks--far before the illusions and human constructs society casts on us.  Do not lose this - Me.

Whether a man thinks he can, or he thinks he can't--He is right. - Henry Ford

The "smarter" we get in this reality, the higher probability of us losing touch with the other dimensions.  We are multi-dimensional beings but with perceptions that are limited to the four dimensions within our physical plane.  Only when we close our eyes, we see better; close our ears, hear better and close our minds, do we understand Truth. - Me

"I believe in intuitions and inspirations. I sometimes feel that I am right. I do not know that I am. When two expeditions of scientists...went forth to test my theory of relativity, I was convinced that their conclusions would tally with my hypothesis. I was not surprised when the eclipse of May 29, 1919, confirmed my intuitions. I would have been surprised if I had been wrong."  - Albert Einstein

"I am enough of the artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world." - Albert Einstein

The Intuitive Mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift. - Albert Einstein

Nature vs Nurture, Free will vs Destiny, Schrodinger's Cat/Quantum Decoherence

On the nature vs nurture debate, there's so many people on both sides saying there side is true but I've always sat on the sidelines because the way I see it.  Why not both?  But I never noticed that I didn't apply the same intuition that I have when it comes to Free Will vs Determinism.

I've forced myself to choose a side on that debate even though my intuition says otherwise.  I've always compared my life as a book already written out--that I'm just living out my life that's written as I flip through the pages but in my gut I knew it wasn't fully correct.  I've refined my saying to more accurately represent what I see.

"My life follows a book that is already written out, but at each moment where a decision or choice must be made--I can choose to either keep following the book that is already written or follow a whole new book." -me

Now some people will say but that's free will !!  With careful observation, there's a nuance in it which gives it a whole new paradigm.  It's not free will but at the same time, it's not destiny either.  And this is how I view the world.  The reason why I couldn't seam well with society and human constructs is that the universe is made to be endless but it is human to quantify, categorize or deconstruct reality so that we can understand it.  But how mainstream society do it scientifically ironically pushes society further away from the truth it until we accept that there are other ways than just through empirical methods or experience.

Now are "Laws of physics" are being challenged in the quantum level.  I've always had this feeling in the past that how science is right now is a like a huge jigsaw puzzle--we make "laws and theories" and all the pieces thus far has fit, but what happens to us when we get to the point where the last piece DOES NOT FIT (and this happens alot in life). We now have to amend our "laws", It's always bothered me because the masses see the world in black and white while I see it as gray.  I wish someone had told me that philosophers and physicists in the past have already tackled this problem of induction and it could have saved me from going into a huge depression.

Our laws of physics can only take us so much but majority of professors that's not updated into the latest research will deny you that and look down on you cause your just a kid.  Our laws of reasoning can only take you so much since the more you know, the less you know but adults will tell you you're just a kid you don't know anything.  People don't realize that the more you get into human constructs like getting a degree, getting a good job, making money, finding success--the less and further you are to understanding the universe/reality.  Now that I'm an "adult" somewhat-- I still hold the same view on how the universe is and how reality is.  Thankfully, learning more about quantum mechanics gives me relief that what and how I see reality and the universe is in line with how science and even religion is heading towards.  Am I different? Not really, I'm both different and same--but that doesn't make sense.  Unfortunately, if you're trying to make sense out of it, you never will.  Some people think inside the box, some people are gifted to see outside the box.. But only when you see that there is no box--is when you'll be able to make "sense" of what I see and feel.

I feel that the universe is a superposition of all possible equations, but only when either you make a conscious choice/observation does it decohere into "reality".  My life so far can be summed into Schrodinger's Cat.  Some people think schrodinger's cat is dead, some say it's alive.. I say it's both-- and that's probably why I've struggled in the past.  99.99% of the world will NEVER be able to relate to me and I should just accept that so I can finally get out of this depression once and for all and try to grow this human construct called "wealth".

The Intuitive Mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant.  We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.  - Albert Einstein

Weekly Review

From Last Week:
- Fun Thanksgiving with fam
- Halted studying during holiday week

Schedule for the Upcoming Weeks
Sunday
- New Rules of Pennystocking DVD 2
- Finish B1's LOC/MFR
- 2 EPR Bullets

Monday
- New Rules of Pennystocking DVD 3
- Finish B2's LOC
- 2 EPR Bullets

Tuesday
- New Rules of Pennystocking DVD 4
- 2 EPR Bullets

Wednesday
- New Rules of Pennystocking DVD 4
- 2 EPR Bullets

Thursday
- New Rules of Pennystocking DVD 5/6

Friday
- WEBINARS !!!

Saturday
- WEBINARS !!!

GOAL:
- Finish New Rules of Pennystocking and get started on Webinars
- Increase reading on Conscious Listening/Mindfulness/Increasing Attention and Focus

DECEMBER 3-9
- WEBINARS

DECEMBER 10-16
- WEBINARS / Tracking Market

DECEMBER 17-23
- WEBINARS / Start Trading


Habits Update

Rituals (For Work Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day

On the road to work

- 30mins of Audiobook

Once I have downtime at work

- Challenge Content

On the road from work

- 30mins of Audiobook

As soon as I get home (In progress)
- Study 0700 - 1030, 5min Journal/Meditation
- Bed routine by 1120 Asleep by 1200

Rituals (For Off Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day
- Stretch Phys. Therapy Regimen

Anything goes on my off day

"Once I have a system, the only thing that matters is the six inches between my ears..."






--------------------------- For December -------------------------------
**** Gamblers think about profits, Traders think about Risk ****
Shifting my attitude/mindset from making money and towards:

1) Risk Management
- Know risk prior to trade
- Know stop loss prior to trade
- Size position accordingly to the stop loss

2) Managing Emotions
- No more zombie trading
- No more revenge trading

3) Managing Mind
- Regular Meditations
- Objectivity Exercises

Mandatory Weekly Goals....
A) Zero (0) Zombie trades
B) Zero (0) Revenge trades
C) Trade only quality/Go-To-Setups.. (Think retired trader)

** Something I want to do in the future--Watch a stock's price action with NO indicators

Rule: If I have either 1 zombie trade or 1 revenge trade during February, I will sit out from trading for a mandatory 1 week cooling off. This will be a negative incentive that will turn me off from making those type of trades since almost all my motivation and raison d'être currently is daytrading.

*** ACCEPTANCE ***

Weekly Review

From Last 2 Weeks:
- Passed DPE 99.7%
- Finished Learn Level II
- 2 hrs into New Rules of Pennystocking

Schedule for the Upcoming Weeks

- This next week is Thanksgiving week and will have a light schedule for studying.  I will try to finish New Rules of Pennystocking if I can.
- After I'm done, Goal is to re-watch trading tickers and then get caught up on webinars.
- Increase reading on Conscious Listening/Mindfulness/Increasing Attention and Focus


GOAL:
- Finish New Rules of Pennnystocking


Habits Update

Rituals (For Work Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day

On the road to work

- 30mins of Audiobook

Once I have downtime at work

- Challenge Content

On the road from work

- 30mins of Audiobook

As soon as I get home (In progress)
- Study 0700 - 1030, 5min Journal/Meditation
- Bed routine by 1120 Asleep by 1200

Rituals (For Off Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day
- Stretch Phys. Therapy Regimen

Anything goes on my off day

"Once I have a system, the only thing that matters is the six inches between my ears..."






--------------------------- For December -------------------------------
**** Gamblers think about profits, Traders think about Risk ****
Shifting my attitude/mindset from making money and towards:

1) Risk Management
- Know risk prior to trade
- Know stop loss prior to trade
- Size position accordingly to the stop loss

2) Managing Emotions
- No more zombie trading
- No more revenge trading

3) Managing Mind
- Regular Meditations
- Objectivity Exercises

Mandatory Weekly Goals....
A) Zero (0) Zombie trades
B) Zero (0) Revenge trades
C) Trade only quality/Go-To-Setups.. (Think retired trader)

** Something I want to do in the future--Watch a stock's price action with NO indicators

Rule: If I have either 1 zombie trade or 1 revenge trade during February, I will sit out from trading for a mandatory 1 week cooling off. This will be a negative incentive that will turn me off from making those type of trades since almost all my motivation and raison d'être currently is daytrading.

*** ACCEPTANCE ***

Weekly Review

From Last Week:
Didn't do anything stocks related at all.  I did brush up on mindfulness/meditating/communication+listening skills.

Bout to finish the Alchemist, it's nice.. mostly about going for your destiny but it's main focus is something im aware of.  The side minute details however are really good to read.

Schedule for the Upcoming Week

- The next two weeks be very light with very minimum expectation.  I have my DPE coming up next week so whatever I can study is a bonus.
- Increase reading on Conscious Listening/Mindfulness/Increasing Attention and Focus

GOAL:
- Finish Learn Level II
- Total 2.1hrs of DVDs
- Finish 1 book
- Just pass the damn DPE already


Habits Update

Rituals (For Work Days)

As soon as I wake up (Mornaing Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day
- Stretch Phys. Therapy Regimen

On the road to work

- 30mins of Audiobook

Once I have downtime at work

- Challenge Content

On the road from work

- 30mins of Audiobook

As soon as I get home (In progress)
- Study 0700 - 1030, 5min Journal/Meditation
- Bed routine by 1120 Asleep by 1200

Rituals (For Off Days)

As soon as I wake up (Morning Ritual)

- Drink Water/Take Vitamins

- Floss/Brush Teeth/Listerine

- Record Blood Pressure/5min Journal/Plan out my day
- Stretch Phys. Therapy Regimen

Anything goes on my off day

"Once I have a system, the only thing that matters is the six inches between my ears..."

--------------------------- For December -------------------------------
**** Gamblers think about profits, Traders think about Risk ****
Shifting my attitude/mindset from making money and towards:

1) Risk Management
- Know risk prior to trade
- Know stop loss prior to trade
- Size position accordingly to the stop loss

2) Managing Emotions
- No more zombie trading
- No more revenge trading

3) Managing Mind
- Regular Meditations
- Objectivity Exercises

Mandatory Weekly Goals....
A) Zero (0) Zombie trades
B) Zero (0) Revenge trades
C) Trade only quality/Go-To-Setups.. (Think retired trader)

** Something I want to do in the future--Watch a stock's price action with NO indicators

Rule: If I have either 1 zombie trade or 1 revenge trade during February, I will sit out from trading for a mandatory 1 week cooling off. This will be a negative incentive that will turn me off from making those type of trades since almost all my motivation and raison d'être currently is daytrading.

*** ACCEPTANCE ***